Little A was cranky for a fair bit of today – not all the time, but on and off. Basically, a bit more volatile than usual. On the bus, she was getting really hyper and trying to climb all over everything, insisting that she was performing in a circus, and when I was adamant that the bus was not, in fact, a circus and she needed to sit down before she fell down and broke something, she became very annoyed with me, leading to the following interchange:

Little A (muttering under her breath): “Bossy bossy bossy bossy bossy bossy bossy…”

Me: “I’m your mom. It’s my JOB to be bossy bossy bossy. Particularly when you try to do things that are likely to result in you hurting yourself or other people.”

Little A (in a threatening tone): “Well, I’M going to have a PARTY!”

Me (trying to figure out why this would be a threat): “For your birthday?”

Little A: “NO! Much sooner than that! And you… are NOT invited!”

Me: “I see. Because I’m too bossy?”

Little A: “YES!”

Me: “How about Mama and Daddy? Are they invited? Because I’m pretty sure they’re bossy too. We kind of have a shared interest in you not accidentally killing yourself.”

Little A: “They’re not invited EITHER! (pauses for thought) In fact, I don’t want to have ANY parents any more!”

Me: “Then who’s going to take care of you, and give you cuddles when you want them, and put band-aids on your booboos, and read you bedtime stories?”

Little A: “NO ONE! Because I won’t go to bed EVER! I’ll just play Minecraft ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT!”

Me: “Well, how will you eat? Someone’s still going to have to make food for you, and give you clean clothes, and stuff like that…”

Little A (getting frustrated): “I’ll…. I’ll REPLACE YOU WITH ROBOT SERVANTS!”